Students who constantly argue can be very challenging! Do you have a student who alway argues and/or analyzes everything you {and their peers} say or do?
Do they debate even the smallest of requests that you make? Do they become argumentative with peers, even those who are trying to be friendly to them, cause them to have few or challenging friendships?
Here are a few things to try “In the moment”
Use A Shut Down Phrase
When the student argues or over analyzes, the first time, offer a rote phrase to show you heard him but are not going to “get into it.” I call it a “shut down phrase.” It may be something like:
- “I hear that you…”
- “we can talk about that later.”
- “so noted.”
- “ah-ha.”
- “hum…”
Keep it very short. Use very few words and an even tone. Do not let the student see/hear you get frustrated with them {easier said than done}.
Then, just move on and continue with what you were saying. Beyond that, ignore further attempts to argue or analyze. If you go down the “rabbit hole” with him/her, you are reinforcing the behavior.
Ignore It
Ignoring is super tough to do but very important with a student who continuously blurts/argues. You will never win an argument with a child who does this. They always find a way to win, generally because they have fewer social/emotional boundaries than you do.
What you are trying to do, is cut the behavior short, while not reinforcing it without meaning to, and then at another time….work on the specific skills the student needs to improve on, in order to stop engaging in this behavior.
Provide An Alternative
You can also try giving the student a note pad to write down his questions or topic changes, to be discussed at a later, agreed upon time.
Additionally, for long term improvement, you will need to teach the social skills needed, for the student to successful stop {or decrease} arguing.
Teach Social Skills
One {of many} important social skills that the student who argues may be lacking is the skill of Negotiating with others.
Need an activity to help you teach your students how to negotiate? I have created a fun little activity that may be just what you need. Students get to role play how to negotiate. This important skill takes lots and lots of practice.
Grab this fun Freebie by clicking on the picture or HERE!
LOVE FREEBIES?!
Thanks So Much and Happy Teaching!
Cindy ~Socially Skilled Kids
Blog Post Originally Written 12/15/19
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